May 25, 2010

Go Fish

Pre-post thoughts: Oh my poor, much-neglected blog. You really got the short end of the stick, getting me for an owner/writer. You probably deserve better. But then, what have you done for me lately? Apart, that is, from taunting me from afar, reminding me how lacking I am. No, you wouldn't do that, would you? Only my own conscience gets to do that. And, let me assure you, it does it quite frequently. Which is probably part of the problem. I feel like I'm constantly being reminded of all the things I have to do, things I should do, things that people want me to do, things that are expected of me, and sometimes that just makes me rebel. Authority issues, much? OK, enough. Either do it or don't. Fish or cut bait. Got it? Got it.

April completely got away from me. On April 30th, at around 11:55pm, I thought, "Oh, I really should post something tonight, or it will have been a month without posts, and I've been trying to be better about that." This was quickly followed by the thought, "Oh, fuck it. It's my blog and I don't feel like it." I think it's safe to say that I have that kind of internal dialogue relatively often. I know that I need more discipline -- I've been writing one particular blog post in my head since March, right after my last one -- but I suppose I lack the motivation to dig down and find it.

I think now would be a good time to go back and take a look at my list of things I want to do this year, as I have actually made some progress on it.

List 1: My Goals For The Upcoming Year - In Progress
  • Take another trip to Los Angeles to visit friends (I went in May)
  • Find or create a job that I can stand (No luck as of yet)
  • Get a new blog design (What I did is all that will be done this year)
  • Put together a disaster-preparedness kit (Nope)
  • Blog more regularly (Clearly, no)
  • Find a volunteer position (The library gig, still enjoying that)
  • Complete some cross-stitch projects (Got 3 completed!)
  • Pare down my possessions (Uh...no)
  • Drink more wine (Some progress here, but not much)
  • Take more photos and organize them (Taking them, yes; organizing them, no.)
  • Watch as many of the movies that "everyone" has seen that I haven't (2 down, many to go)
You know what? That's actually better than I thought it would, given that not quite half the year is gone. There's also one more thing that I mentally put on my list and have actually done it; it's not something I want to go into here, but I want to give myself credit for accomplishing it! Let's just say that I'm trying to improve my social life and I'm taking steps to do that, m'kay?

That brings us to my latest list, which I wrangled with for a long time back in, oh, February. (I have discovered, by the way, that these kinds of lists really tax my memory and creativity. When people ask me questions along the line of "What's your favorite [fill in the blank]?" my mind tends to totally freeze up. I never really realized that about myself before embarking on this list thing.) These are the people whom I consider to be my heroes, in no particular order.

List 2: My Heroes
Many of them are, I'm sure, terribly predictable and would make many peoples' lists. But the ones I've linked to are those that might have you asking, "Who?" If you're interested in hearing the "Why?" then let me know. This post is already far longer than I intended and I need to have something for next time.