September 22, 2004

Cell Phone Madness

I think most of us know that cell phone use has gotten out of hand. I'm convinced that within a few generations, all children will be born with their hands curled up next to their ear. You can't go anywhere without someone blithely walking around with all their attention focused on their terribly important call -- you know, the one about what they're going to wear to the party this weekend...while they completely ignore the person they're supposedly with...who's on his phone, too. But, of course, the people who can't go a few minutes without taking or making a call don't see that this is a cause for concern.

If you're yapping, yapping, yapping on your phone constantly while you're driving and think that it doesn't affect the way that you drive, I am here with a news flash for you: You are not the exception and your driving sucks about 90% of the time you have that expensive piece of plastic shoved up against the side of your head. (Can you tell that I don't think there are many excuses for not having a hands-free device in use when making calls from the car?) You don't have the ability, apparently, to see the reactions of your fellow drivers when you're a 40mph zombie in a 55mph zone, or when you suddenly veer over to make the turn you didn't notice coming up. May I also point out that making a U-turn is not a cause for shame -- and, in most cases, is not illegal -- when you do suddenly snap-to and realize you're about to miss the road you needed to take? Many of us actually consider it preferable to the emergency maneuver you insist on making when it's not an emergency for anyone but you.

But that's not what this is about, or at least not entirely. These are just examples of the weird and pervasive presence that cell phones have become in our lives. This is about how it is only going to get much weirder and even more pervasive.

Gee, I can't wait.